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George Carlin's view on aging

By:George Carlin's
Date: Thu,01 Mar 2007
Submitter:George Carlin's
Views:1512

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George Carlin's view on aging

Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we
like to get old is when we're kids?

If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited
about aging that you think in fractions.

"How old are you?" "I'm four and a half!" You're never
thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going
on five!

That's the key. You get into your teens, now they
can't hold you back.

You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.

"How old are you?" "I'm gonna be 16!" You could be 13,
but hey, you're gonna be 16!

And then the greatest day of your life . . . you
become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony . . .
YOU BECOME 21. . . YESSSS!!!

But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there?
Makes you sound like bad milk.
He TURNED, we had to throw him out. There's no fun
now, you're just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's
changed?

You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40.

Whoa! Put on the brakes, it's all slipping away.
Before you know it, you REACH 50 . . . and your dreams
are gone.

But wait!!! You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you
would!

So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE
it to 60.

You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After
that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!

You get into your 80s and every day is a complete
cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH
bedtime.

And it doesn't end there. Into the 90s, you start
going backwards; "I was JUST 92."

Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100,
you become a little kid again. "I'm 100 and a half!"

May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!
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